The MOC Weekly Rundown, Nov. 18: Mary J. Blige’s Marriage Rules

First of all, I love, love, LOVE me some Mary J. Blige: she was one of the first major artists I interviewed as a professional journalist and her music/performances speak to me in a way that few have done in my generation. Since Ms. Blige and I both have wedding anniversaries in December, I was interested in reading about her views on marriage and was surprised at her stance on outside friendships. Maybe in her industry that rigidity is needed, or maybe the way they met is how it came about. IMO, older friends (HS school buddies, for example) should be alright, newer ones could be drama waiting to happen. What do you think about a spouse not being allowed opposite sex friends?

Mary-J-Blige-husba

“The couple live in a $12 million mansion beside the Hudson River in New Jersey and will celebrate their 11th wedding anniversary next month. “It definitely feels like an achievement. I never thought I’d last this long in a marriage,” she admits.

What are the benefits of marrying one’s manager, I ask. “He always has my back – he’s going to fight to the death for Mary J Blige. The downside is that there’s no separation – it’s on all the time. When you don’t feel like answering to your manager, he’s still your husband,” she says, laughing. How do they negotiate that? “If one of you doesn’t want to talk about something right now, you have to respect that. And you have to respect each other’s space.”

They have separate groups of friends. “All females for me, all guys for him,” she says, sternly. “There’s none of that, ‘Oh, that’s my female friend. Oh, that’s my guy friend.’ No. Not in a marriage, I’ve never seen that work.” But being a wife has changed her in ways she didn’t expect. “Being a single person and an artist, there’s a lot of selfishness that you don’t even know you have,” she says. “Being a wife, it’s not all about me.” (Telegraph Music)

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