Tina & Teddy Campbell: Healing Their Hurts, Sharing The “Dirt”

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It’s a theme-turned-template that’s fueled countless hit songs, TV dramas and divorce cases over the years: Boy meets Girl, Boy commits to Girl, Boy creeps behind Girl’s back and both of them suffer the consequences.

Only a few years ago, if word hit the streets that Mr. So-And-So was seen stepping out on Mrs.You-Know-Who’s with Ms.What’s-Her-Name, the details usually remained under wraps and the final outcome was handled privately behind closed doors. But today, due to the prevalence of social media and reality TV, the inner workings of intimate relationships come across in crystal-clear HD with digitally-enhanced sound, saving all of the salacious details for a painful perpetuity that neither party can escape.

This is the sad scenario now unfolding for WeTV reality star Tina Campbell, better known as one-half of the hit-making contemporary gospel sister duo, Mary Mary. In the second season of their self-titled and highly-rated reality show, there were hints that her home situation with husband Teddy was less than ideal.

But in the June edition of Ebony magazine, Tina confessed to surviving betrayal, entertaining felonious thoughts and the marital infidelity committed by Teddy. Those gospel roots and love of the Lord aside, Campbell told Ebony that she came thisclose to assaulting the man (“I did physically try to stab him, several times.”) and struggled through the anger and humiliation to enter counseling and save the marriage. “I decided to forgive him because what I represent is a God who is forgiving and a God who is loving. This is what we represent in our music, right?” she told the magazine.

Fans who were divided about this confession and the motivation behind it (realism, ratings, revenge?) are even more conflicted thanks to a prepared statement in which the couple asked for extra reinforcement via prayers and fasting from other Christian believers.

But it seems as if Teddy is content to allow Tina to blame everything and everyone other than him.

“My husband’s struggle, was with sexual immorality BUT I have struggled with anger, rage, unforgiveness, pride, just to name a few, for over 2 decades,” the statement reads. “The devil wanted to use strongholds that took hold of our lives in our childhood, to remain and destroy us as adults. So now instead of being mad at each other we’re mad at the devil and we’re ready to fight.”

Hmm … OK. Teddy’s decision to sleep with a longtime friend of the family behind his wife’s back had nothing to do with the “anger, rage, and unforgiveness” she expressed, right? Why is “the devil” responsible for his actions, but not for hers? And if the Mrs. is such a longtime headache, where did all of the back-to-back babies come from (they have four children together)? Un. Real.

Before ending with scripture quotes, the statement said the Campbells were entering a 30-day-period of fasting and prayer to call forth a miracle in their 12-year marriage.

Marriages are as different as the people who enter into them, so if the Campbells want to pray, fast, attend counseling and do whatever they deem acceptable to save that union, more power to them.

But what some fans and true believers have a problem with, obviously, is the fact that Campbell apparently puts all of the responsibility of his wayward sex organs on others when the final decision lay (pun intended) with him and him alone. Dealing with problems in the first place requires that people acknolwedge their part in creating them, not by acting as if the errors they perpetuated never existed in the first place.

I don’t personally know the Campbells, but if I did, I’d suggest that they continue the counseling, fasting and prayer regimen, and on the way home, plug in the iPod and cue up Anthony Hamilton’s poignant hit single, “Pray For Me.”

In a couple of verses, Hamilton sings from the perspective of an unfaithful man, begs the Lord for another chance and—-here’s the important part—-actually admits he messed up: “Girl I know-oh-oh what I should’ve done, shoulda walked away the moment that I saw her coming. But I blew it, really blew it, and lost the only girl I loved.”

Infidelity. It’s an old story with a revolving door of new locales and new players. However, the outcomes that resonate with us the strongest and have a better shot at redemption in the long run are those in which the “villain” doesn’t blame the “victim” for his or her selfishness.

After all, asking fans to pray for you is one thing, but expecting them to pity you and simultaneously help to throw stones everywhere except at your own glass house reveals character traits too ugly for a lighting crew, wardrobe expert and even the best best make-up artists to successfuly hide.

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2 Comments

  • Reply Margaret (@margswrld)

    AMEN!

    I get that they wanna work on their marriage. OK. But him blaming her is wayyyyyy outta line.

    I mean really, yes she’s on the road working. OK but would the excuse be the same if she was in a office downtown?

    May 14, 2014 at 7:23 pm
    • Reply Lorrie Irby Jackson

      Excellent points Margaret: when some folks want to justify a choice badly enough, ANY excuse will do. Thanks for adding your insight!

      May 15, 2014 at 12:42 pm

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